I have come to the realization that I need to move out. Even though I'd probably be a baby and suffer from separation anxiety, I don't know how much more of my family I can stand. I love them and they love me. However, I feel so constricted here and unable to go out and do things. I wanted to go out the other night, but my dad tells me, "It's too late. It's past your curfew." What?! Seriously he says just because I'm 18 and I have a car doesn't mean I can just up and leave. Well I know that. But when you rack on me because I'm such a hermit and have practically no friends then your just contributing to the problem. There just looking out for me, yeah yeah. But give me a little slack. All I seem to do is go to school, come home, go to a volleyball game, eat and then comeback home, day in and day out. What a boring life.
That's why moving out would give me some freedom. Unfortunately, I face a few problems:
1) I don't have a job. This is probably the biggest thorn in my side. I have this fear that if I go out and get one, I'll screw up with scheduling and then I'll start flunking classes and fall behind. But I guess that's why I'd schedule work AROUND school hours.
2) I have little money in my pocket. I have some in the bank, but I spent $300 like in September on books and gas. Having a scholarship helps, since I get the extra money in my pocket. Like I said though, it pretty much goes all to books. Stupid bookstore.
& 3) I have sworn to myself and the others around me that I will never ever work at a fast food joint. Hell to the no. I can eat there, that's fine and dandy. But getting a job at like McDonald's or Taco Bell does not fly with me. Just the image bugs me. At a trip to Panda the other day I noticed that the cashier used to be one of the head cheerleaders at Cholla before graduating. She was also a mentor in the program I was a part of. It sucked, but that's a story for another time. Anyways, it was sort of depressing seeing her like that. Why? Not sure. Maybe just the thought that she was so popular in high school and now is reduced to an employee at a chain of Chinese food restaurants. That's not to say she doesn't have friends or doesn't attend some school. But if not, what a downer.
That goes for restaurants too. I don't want to be a waiter. Working at Borders, however, would be fun. I've always enjoyed shopping there and I like reading, when I can of course. But living way out in the boondocks hinders me from getting a job I'd probably really enjoy. Everything around here blows. And all the better jobs are on the North and East sides of town.
Where it stands, no I won't be moving out anytime soon. I wouldn't have anywhere to stay anyways. I'll just appreciate what time I have mooching a room off my parents. Cause them when I'm out on my own, God I'm sure I'll regret it.
Then again I don't want to be those kids who live in their parents basement for the rest of their lives. Good thing we don't have a basement.
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